Well everybody I'm back again.

Sorry I wasn't around this weekend but I was in Northern Ireland to help with Alex's Silver Lining Appeal as you know and I am only just now getting myself back to sort of normal.

It was some weekend. The garden party was a huge success, so many people coming to support Alex through her chosen charity. Don't know what the total is yet so wouldn't presume but I know it will be a good one and I can only say a huge thank you to all the people there who were so kind to Tabby and myself, offering superb hospitality and great friendship. Most of all though I thank Alex who I think I will always see as a courageous and inspiring woman who puts all of the rest of us to shame.

We all have problems in our lives that niggle and seem huge but we can go to bed and most times wake up in the morning to find the solution. Alex and the millions of people like her wake up in the morning knowing there is no solution. There is always hope though. As Lluest's charity motto says, "In the face of uncertainty there is nothing wrong with hope."

I can honestly say that when I watched Alex move through the day on Saturday, I could understand that sentence.

I think she may still be incarcerated in the hospital today so don't know if she will read this till she gets out but I think I speak for all of us here when I say that we all hope for the best for her.

Oh heavens, I've gone all emotional.

Meant to be

It seems that it was indeed meant to be that we should come to Lluest.

This is a follow on from my previous post; the comment about Jeanine McMullen piqued my curiosity and I did google the good lady. According to a thread I found on another website she lives somewhere here in Llanddeusant. That is about the biggest coincidence that could have happened. Our postal address here is actually Llandduesant. How spooky is that?

I read her books and before that I listened to the Radio 4 programme "A Small Country Living." Jeanine McMullen was a big inspiration to me, removing to a smallholding and making a life for herself. I realised I wanted to do something like that. It made no difference to me that her books were all about the 70's and that things probably would have changed. And as Adrian was of the same mind we went for it.

When we acquired Merlin our greyhound, I recalled that she'd had a greyhound or perhaps Whippet that it was also called Merlin and when we agreed on the name, I remarked that Merlin was part and parcel of our hunt for a new life. By that time we were well and truly looking for something, we knew not what, but we both knew we would find some sort of place we could go and Merlin's very bizarre arrival was sort of an omen to me. Some time I will have to tell you about that, it was really very strange.

Anyway time went on and I forgot all about Jeanine McMullen and the books and then we found this place in Wales and I was again reminded about it all again when I noticed a big old ash tree near the side of the barn.

Just like in the book, "Wind in the Ash Tree." It all fell in place, we sold the house in Suffolk in 6 weeks to the very first people that looked at it, and exactly 6 weeks after the sale we moved here.

And now to find that the lady that inspired me so much actually lives in the same parish as the one we have found ourselves in seems to me to be the final piece of our puzzle if you like, we have come the full circle and ended up right where we belong.

If I can find out an address, I will write a letter to her and thank her for getting us to the right place. I wouldn't expect a reply, not my style but I feel tht I owe the lady a lot.

How many people can do this on a Sunday afternoon? I suppose the answer is how many people want to but I like it. I have always wanted to be able to take the goats for a walk and living here I can and I can take the dogs with me as well which is even nicer. It is something that strangely I have always fancied doing. Another dream realised.

The small goat in front is Kaiser (Bill) and the huge brown lump with the flappy ears that always manages to keep herself in front of me is Violet. She isn't a milker nor of course is Kaiser but I don't care, I like my goats. Yesterday I worked all day on making up two new information boards for someone to take to the Cwm Ddu fete on the 27th June, the same day we will be in Northern Ireland so afterwards to clear my head I took the dogs up the field and the goats joined me. Today I got Adrian to take a few photos just to prove I did it.


A few more photos that I took this morning then. I wanted to try and get the purple haze of grasses that you see in the field. I think I have captured it.

Isn't that just the biz? And one of the grasses themselves. It is nearly up to my knees in that field. Soon be time to try and get someone to cut it for hay. We have tried for the last 2 summers and failed. Most of the contractors are too busy to do small fields, they want to do hundereds of acres, not the 6 or 7 we have. As hay is one of our biggest expenses here, we would like to do our own and the grass contains a lot of herbage that our ponies thrive on. It is better for them than some of the posh hay we end up buying.


























And just a couple of the dogs this morning, can't resist it. If you recall I said they run hell for leather for no apparent reason. I think it is the noise of the grasses that fascinates them.

























So that's another day done and dusted. I really don't know where the time goes. I have been working all day apart for the these two sorties into the fields and I still haven't transplanted the cabbages. Did cut the back grass though. That takes an hour and a half on it's own. Hard work. I shall definitely transplant the cabbages tomorrow.


Off now to make spaghetti sauce and perhaps throw together a cake without using any eggs as our solitary hen has gone on strike.

shearings and meetings

Been a hectic couple of days up here one way and another. Also rather disappointing as our much awaited television debut didn't take place. Monday should have been the date and I checked my e-mail from the producer but we didn't appear so it must be next week. There was I clearing off the mantle shelf for my BAFTA and it didn't happen. Oh well, fame comes at a price I guess and I must be more patient.

Now then, the picture above is of two recent additions to my flock. The one with horns is Gregory and the other is named Timothy. Not sure what breed they are, Gregory is badger faced and Timothey has a bit so Suffolk in him but heaven knows about the rest, I don't think I have ever met such a large sheep, Timothy's feet are bigger than mine and I reckon he is a lot bigger than Cquirt, the Shetland pony. A couple more photographs of this pair are called for I think

Gregory is a very handsome sheep and knows it. I understand that castration came only after he did a runner from his previous home one spring time and was found several weeks later entertaining the ladies in another farmer's field. I believe that there were lots of Gregory look alikes in the field that year.

This is Timothy, a magnificent guy. But I am afraid it is Tim, Tim, nice but dim as there isn't a lot going of between the ears unless it is food related .

They are now living with my girls, 5 Balwen ewes we bought last year. They are probably less than half the size of Gregory let alone Timothy but after a day or two of not being sure, everybody gets on together very well.

Better than I had hoped actually as yesterday I had to to take them for shearing. The farmer at the bottom of the hill offered to do my sheep with his or at least let me shear them on the same day and he gave me a ring in the morning. First problem of course was to get them to his farm, he offered to bring some of his sheep along to coax the Balwens out of the field but I was pleased to find that as I rattled a bucket Timothy and Gregeory followed me so the girls followed them and we went out of the bottom gate, onto the road, across the bridge and down to the farm. How good was that? The farmer saw Timothy and blanched a bit I have to say. He has big sheep but not that big. Anyway bless him, the farmer did Gregory and Timothy and one of the girls and I did the other 4 girls. They are all bald now in a sheep sort of way. The girls had never been sheared before so weren't keen and being Balwens (semi-wild mountain sheep), tried their normal tricks of either trying to jump out of the pen or trying to thread themselves through the gate but all went well though I am afraid there was no point in keeping their fleeces as they were in so many bits that all they are fit for is chucking. I was shot to bits after only 4 small ones so how professional men do hundreds in a day is beyond me away. Took me several minutes to stand upright again.

But it's done for another year and they are wormed as well. Everybody looks several pounds lighter apart from Timothy who even without the wool still looks like he could lose a pound or two and not notice. In fact I am considering changing his name. I think we should call him Ty Bach as he is very much like the little brick building we have in the middle of our back garden. It's our icon, the outside toilet and Timothy is built like a brick....well perhaps I shall go no further.

Such is the life

Big day yesterday.

Sometime ago we were asked to go to the Coleg Elydir Open Day, I am sure I mentioned it in passing.

Yesterday was the day. We had wondered if we were going to be able to take any ponies, obviously not from the farm as we have strangles but we took Maggy and Sapphire, 2 Trust ponies who are at a loan home up near Llyn y Fan and therefore not involved in our problem. All last week Tabby and I redid the info boards so that we could take them with us to Northern Ireland and also to this Open Day and I was still fiddling with them yesterday morning.

We were due there about 2 so we left the farm here at just gone 12.15, I had asked about where we should park the truck as the ponies are in a field well tucked away up a steep lane etc. Adrian has been up there on foot before so he had a rough idea of where he was supposed to be going and had we all thought about it we would have asked if the two girls could be in their other field which is definitely more accessible. But we didn't think about that did we?

So off we go and it is clear that we aren't going to get the truck too far up the lane, at one point there was a hairpin bend and a recent landslide. I was sweating. Adrian was as well and announced that he would go no further so had to back the truck round the hairpin and try not to drop the truck down the valley. I was definitely sweating by then let me tell you. There is something about a drop of 100 feet that makes you worry a bit.

We set off on foot. "How far is it?" says I.

"Miles." he replied.

About a mile and a half up hill actually. Lovely views, incredible views but it was nearly 1 by then so we pushed on all the way to probably somewhere near China (I am convinced) and eventually there were the ponies with their 3 people so we set off back down the mile and a half of lane to the truck, Adrian edged it round a bit and Sapphire loaded wonderfully. Not so Maggy who didn't think she was going anywhere, thank you very much. A total stranger who lives up there somewhere was driving up the lane and stopped to give us a hand, in the end it took all 6 of us half an hour to get Maggy in the truck and it was just coming up to 1.45 when we set off again, arriving only a half an hour late.

The Open Day was wonderful and we were very well received. The students were thrilled to see ponies and of course the ones that come to the Trust for their work experience were the most thrilled of all. As were their parents who said that they found the difference in thier children noticable and their confidence unbelievably increased. We did lots of networking and chatting and smiling and bloody hell is that hard work.

We were to have left at 5 but it was gone 6 when we loaded up again, Maggy was much better this time and we had plenty of help as well. Off we set and we got back, parked in a handy layby (thank goodness) and popped the two ponies in their alternative and more accessible field, jumped back into the truck thinking it was a job done, Adrian turned the key and....

Nothing...flat battery...flatter than a pancake actually. I looked at Adrian, he looked at me.

"Nice evening for a walk then."

So we got out of the truck, locked it, and walked the mile or so home down a hill and up another hill and across a field and into our back garden and then started on our own animals at about quarter to 8.

Shot to bits we were. Dinner was beans on toast with a glass (or 2 or 3) of wine and half a bar of Bournville chocolate.

This is not an easy life but such is the life we lead. Anything can happen and frequently does.

It's the way it is.

I'm back

Bet you didn't even notice.

Been a packed week one way and another. Managed to clear out the spare room successfully for my visitor but it did mean that I had stuff piled into the bedroom as well as the hobbit house and that the cats were down 2 beds having to make do with sitting on the dining chairs or stealing a dog bed when they weren't looking.

Still, got lots of work done here as well, that has to go on and time before heading out to Northern Ireland is getting short.

Last Monday we had a really good day with the Coleg students. They have worked so very hard here and as we had a horse available that was quiet as well as rideable we gave them an oppportunity to have a ride. Well supervised of course. They were a bit wobbly and perhaps a bit apprehensive but to give them their due, both of them did extremely well. I took a couple of photographs.

We were all pleased with how that went. Gives you a real nice feeling inside when people enjoy life that much.

Tuesday was Adrian's day off so we took our visitor with us while Adrian did a trimming session on 2 horses that hadn't been handled very much and had virtually no manners at all despite being 4 and 5 years old. In the end it turned into more of a horse handling session particularly for the 4 year old, the owners have decided that he will come to us for some basic ground work and training after we get rid of strangles. He was a handfull but only because he hasn't learned how to be any different. I remembered why we keep up the private dental insurance though when the gelding started throwing his head around and nearly caught Adrian across the jaw.

The evening was somewhat marred by the fact that we had trouble between the greyhounds and Seven the newly returned cat. We were out for most of the day, the dogs were excited when we got home and treed Seven but not before Merlin managed to pull a few hairs out of his tail. Seven gave him a few good scrapes with his claws, Merlin still bears the scars but is unrepentant about his behaviour. Seven did a runner up the tree and we left him there when we went out for the evening but he seemed to have disappeared again. I called him in about 9.30 poor chap, he was bloodied but unbowed, had a stiff leg and was very, very angry. Being me I worried about him all night but he did recover. He is a bit tentative about coming in now and we are back in the same mode we had to assume when Jack first decided he would like to eat one of our other cats. I am sure it will sort itself out in the end, after all Sofie the cat is still here and there is no longer a problem but I fear this may take longer.

Since then it has been all go to recontruct information boards etc for the Open Day at Coleg Elidyr that we are attending tomorrow afternoon. We will be taking some horses after all, I suddenly remembered Maggy and Sapphire, 2 ponies we recently rehomed just over the hill and who would be unaffected by strangles. I rang the loan home the other day and they were more than pleased to assist. We will collect the 2 ponies on the way and will return them in the afternoon so that should work out. I am pleased we can make the best use of the Coleg Open Day, it would have been a shame not to have some animals there as it is the animals that figure so much in the students work experience. I have found it far more rewarding than I thought I would. Watching them even briefly from week to week has shown me how much they have been able to achieve. They can get on with a lot of the work unassisted, they know the routine and the work suits them. We are happy to continue having them and even better, the Coleg are happy to have us.

AWOL

I thought I had better explain why I am not available just at the moment.


I have Adrian's father staying here for a week and as ever things get a bit muddled and changed so I am probably not going to be available till Friday this week.

No doubt I shall have lots to say.

Speak to you all soon.

I am sitting up in the spare room, my "office", watching the rain fall and my beloved husband pottering about doing what is obviously a necessary job today, that of repairing a gate in a man/farmer way which means you hit what ever it is very hard with a hammer.

I have noticed this about most men. Why not use a sledge hammer to crack a nut if that is what it takes? I think it's an ancient guy -type thing going back to a less sophisticated era when drills, tape measures and electric screwdrivers hadn't been invented and the only way to deal with the problem was to whack it back into shape which is what he appears to be doing. Oh well, as long as it works and he is happy that is all that matters. I have also noticed how grey he is going. Poor man, probably my constant nagging has done it.


Across the gate that he is "repairing" the cloud is hanging so low in the valley that in places I can't quite see where the cloud starts and the hill finishes. And behind us I can't see the mountain at all today, not unusual. It looks as flat as East Anglia from here, no sign of anything more vertical that a bowling green all the way to the top lane.

Of course the wet and much cooler weather has meant that we have lots of animals in again. One or two of the very elderly ponies were shivering with the cold and Humphrey and Sadie have both come in, Humphrey now looks like he is wearing his dressing gown though it's really a red flannel blanket. Sadie is fine but once Hump comes in, he must have his woman with him or he worries she might be flirting with some of the other chaps on the farm. To be fair she is a bit of a tart. Always making eyes at Cquirt and Hamish who lodge on the other side of the fence to them. Even though Sadie is only a Shetland pony I doubt if Cquirt could hit the target anyway.

So Adrian will have twelve stables to clear out tomorrow while I get on with housework. His father is visiting for a few days as of Monday and I can't find the floor in this spare bedroom for STUFF everywhere.

But it isn't STUFF in the modern classification of"Items of no real use" type STUFF, this is more like I don't know- pseudo survival STUFF.

There's the dog toy box- fairly crucial if you value your few bits of decent furniture. Then there is all the beer and wine making kit including the 5 gallons of pinot grigio that I am supposedly making in five days but that has been sitting there since I started it in March. I decided that I would bottle it all up today and then spent so long looking for the sterilizing crystals that I lost my enthusiasm for the job. It will have to be done tomorrow which then raises the problem of where I store the bottled wine as this is a really small house, there is virtually no storage space and all those bottles will take up more space than the 5 gallons bucket it is all sitting in at the moment. Might have to drink it then. What a bummer.

There are also several bottles of unopened spring water that we bought when we had the big freeze and bottled water was all we had for cooking and drinking for eleven days. Twenty seven litres in all. Something inside me would be greatly offended if I was to just dump that lot down the drain and as it is unopened it should last for a very long time despite the sell/use by dates on the bottles. How can bottled water have sell by dates anyway? So I need to keep that somewhere and the spare room was a very handy place as you never know we could have another big freeze any day now, this being Wales. I am back into my flannel shirts and the house smells of wet dogs and waterproofs again by the way.

So I don't know where all this STUFF is going to end up. Maybe in the little shed attached to the side of the house that I think was a wash house and is so small and cramped that we call it The Hobbit House. It holds my washer and dryer at the moment with little room for anything else so if I do all the necessary laundry today and tomorrow morning, I reckon I can stand all the various bottles of liquid and the dog toys in there as long as I don't have to do an emergency load of laundry. What do you suppose constitutes an emergency load of laundry anyway? An invitation to the Palace I would imagine. Perhaps I won't worry too much then.

After one whole week of sunshine we revert to normal Welsh weather and so far we have had maybe 36 hours of rain. But even that has a certain charm as there is no wind today and you can hear the raindrops pattering on the leaves of the trees which I always think is a very nice sound to be able to hear, much nicer than the roar of traffic. When I took the dogs for their run they all ran like mad through the buttercups and I could hear a swishing noise as a greyhound shot past me hell for leather on the way to nowhere in particular. There was a look of real enjoyment on their greyhound faces as well as them being covered in wet buttercup petals. There is nothing like a real greyhound grin to cheer you up and mostly that happens when they have a good belt across a field unrestricted and just for the pure joy of it.

Worth standing around in the rain for.

Modern technology, there is no escape now

Been a very busy couple of days up here. As some of you already know, the Groom and myself are away to Northern Ireland for a charity garden party in aid of Lluest Horse and Pony Trust. It is being organised by our very good friend and ex- volunteer who is suffering from cancer and in her own words......

"You are by now no doubt aware of the rather large black cloud that currently sits in the vicinity of my head ... however, as the saying goes, with every cloud there is a silver lining...."

"I am now on a mission in the coming months to raise as much money as possible for a charity that is very close to my heart, the Lluest Horse and Pony Trust ."

Incredible person. So positive in her outlook that she certainly puts me to shame.

Now for the modern technology bit so that you won't all be wondering.

Their committee had their first meeting last night in N.I. and I was asked if I would like to attend. Not in person of course, I won't go over till the weekend of the garden party but using Skype which is some sort of FREE (you read a'right I did type FREE) computer database thingee that allows you to plug a special headset into your machine and get on with it. I could hear all that was going on( sounded like a hell of a cocktail party) and I could speak to them. Dont forget they can hear all you say as well so don't have a disagreement with your husband like I did. But there you go, just proves we are human I guess.

It all felt a bit Eurovision to me. I had this real urge to say something like "Good evening Northern Ireland, this is Wales calling. Douze point." whilst wearing a posh frock and standing arm in arm with a handsome young man with very white teeth. Needless to say I couldn't do that as I don't have a posh frock any more. It was a good meeting with lots of things sorted and I was there virtually.

I just sometimes marvel at the way modern technology has progressed. A lot of it I am not keen on, mobile phones for one thing, can't bear them especially in the middle of the supermarket when the caller is trying to decide whether parsnips are good for dinner or not. But this Skype thing has my vote I think. It has allowed me to take part in something important, something worthwhile that I would have been in the dark about. So, thank you modern technology.

For the next two weeks or so I shall be rushing round getting stuff ready to go to the weekend; Tabby and I are manning the Lluest stall where folk will be able to find out more about the Trust and what goes on here. There is a lot to do but then perhaps it was time a lot of it was done, some of the information boards are to be updated with some of the more recent ponies that have come into the Trust. Chance and Cquirt will have a board to themselves; Abandoned Animals. Also one about our education animals, Zorro and Sonny. We take them to schools to show the children the basics of equine care, always helps to have a hoof there when you are trying to tell children how to clean them out and the two ponies are rock solid with people.
Several more boards to take about our work here and about the history of the place and it's founder that will show what we are all about.

Other than that, the strangles and the flu symptoms infection rumble on, looks like a couple of the animals have one or the other now though it is hard to tell which is which till the advanced stages.

We did have a bit of good luck yesterday. Adrian was contacted and asked if he would like some hay off the field at a good price and so we had 120 bales delivered which meant we have some cracking hay now in the barn. The smell of newly cut hay is intoxicating and is a real smell of summer time. I am glad I didn't have to help unload it though as it was definitely a hot afternoon. I let Adrian have the first shower. Very gracious of me but also very necessary for him.

Keeping my sprits up

A bit tricky at the moment I have to say.

To add to our problem, yesterday we were told by the vet that Chance's infection is Strangles. The dreaded "S" word that we really didn't want to hear. It is an infection of the glands that run under a horse's chin and can be fatal though not usually. But when you have strangles, the yard closes down completely as it is highly contagious. We think that one or two of the others have it now but it is hard to tell the difference between the first infection and strangles so we just have to watch and wait to see what happens. We will be closed now for at least a month, maybe more and of course all equine movements are forbidden till it's all over.

Never mind, we will carry on as before.

To cheer myself up I went through the photographs I took yesterday at St David's and I have to say that one or two of them please me greatly. I took a course in digital photography a year of so ago and quite enjoy snapping away without worrying about taking any duff ones, the plus of a digital camera of course is to be able to delete the ones that don't work. So here are a couple of shots I took of inside the cathedral (if I can get this bit right.)

Not too bad as it was a bit dark.

It is a very peaceful place and absolutely oozing with history, the tomb is Edmund Tudor who would have been Henry VIII's grandfather as far as I can work out.

Outside the weather was perfect and I took a couple more shots, probably the same ones people have always taken but I don't care. I took these.

Ok, the guy in the shorts is Adrian but it was a warm day and anyway his legs aren't too bad for a man.

One or two more I think.

Just when you think it is safe.....

We thought we were over the lurgy. No new cases for 2 weeks so we should be ok we thought.

But no, it is not to be. Adrian and I went out today for the day and lo and behold, we come back to find that Willow, up in the main herd apparently has the flu or whatever it is.

To say we are all fed up is putting it mildly I have to say.

That means that no horses can go out again, just when we were starting to plan which events we could attend.

No more horses in either as we are now full to bursting so we can't help any other people with their problems, Adrian is still turning away roughly 2 animals a day but as we can't move any, we can't help them.

Fund raising is beginning to be an issue now. With no animals allowed out, we won't have the impact we would have had. Outside fund raising is necessary and we will have to pull out all the stops to get as much in as we can.

We can't let this beat us, won't let this beat us but my goodness it would be nice to have some good news for a change.

Last night I spoke to our very good friend in Northern Ireland who used to be one of our volunteers and has returned to N.I. to undergo chemo therapy for cancer. Despite the treatment she is in good spirits and wants to help the Trust in absentia so to speak by holding a fund raising day and fete near where she lives. I am to go over there to "man" the Lluest stall and there is a great deal of work to be done before the event which is to be held on June 27th.

I am looking forward to seeing her and her husband and all of us at the Trust are touched by her ability to think of Lluest even at this difficult time. I can't say I would have as much courage as she does under the same circumstances.